in the past week, i have become more and more aware of how loved i am by people here, and how quickly i have built a home in a place that was recently so frighteningly new.
my advisor spent the entire day with me today – drove me to the hospital, sat with me in pre-op for TWO HOURS because i was so dehydrated i needed 2 liters of fluid before i could give them their damn urine sample, (to my defense – they told me not to drink or eat past midnight, and my pre-op appointment wasn’t until 9:30. what was i supposed to be peeing out, exactly?), stocked me up on easy-to-grab foodstuffs, got my prescriptions for me, went to subway and got me dinner. and in between it all we just talked and laughed and killed time.
i have gotten offers from students and classmates to help me out, bring me food, drive me to PT, and come over for movie nights. the best part is that most of them know how stubborn and proud i am, so they simply won’t take ‘no’ for an answer.
when i think of these past few months, oftentimes i feel only the drum-tight pain of my mother’s death; the hollowness of a wedding cancelled; the gut-wrenching sadness of losing my puppy; and recently, the stress and panic of not only a major surgery, but the implications it will have on my life and my recovery.
but in focusing on the pain, i neglect all of the beauty: the brightest and most entertaining and hard-working batch of students i ever could have asked for; the completion of a master’s thesis project that was innovative and honestly, a blast to do, and may also lead to conferences and presentations in the near future that would be of great professional importance; yoga students that have completely changed my life in so many ways – with their openness, their love of adventure, and their willingness to let me be a part of their various life journeys; family and friends that have rallied around me and lifted me up, again and a again, when i have threatened to crumble; and now, even as i’m laying here full of percocet and oxycontin with a completely numb right leg, i am so amazed and grateful for the beautiful souls in my life who are offering their time, food, cars, and company just to help me heal.
if i ever need a reminder of how blessed i am…here it is.