becoming infinite

always learning. always growing. always lifting heavy things.


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it has become glaringly apparent to me that when classes aren’t in session, i may as well resign myself to the fact that i become a complete sloth.

which is how i found myself spending this morning (after 9 glorious hours of sleep) revamping my blog. new title, new header photo, new theme. and i quite like it!

i also made lists – i love lists! i mapped out a general schedule of each day of the week once the semester gets rolling, and started thinking ahead to what i need to bring, food-wise, each day. pre-keto i always kept greek yogurt in the office and protein bars and crackers in mt gym bag in case i got hungry during the day. but since none of those are options (outside of my carb-up day) i have to plan a little more precisely.

it will all become second nature by the middle of february; it’s just these initial couple of weeks that will take some adjusting!

coach and i finalized my split, and it looks something like this:

sunday: rest (teach 90-minute power yoga class)
monday: conditioning (teach 60-minute power yoga class)
tuesday: deadlift (teach 60-minute power yoga class)
wednesday: speed bench/OHP
thursday: rest
friday: squat
saturday: bench

as the meet gets closer, monday will turn into an active recovery day rather than conditioning. i’m hoping to see lots of gains in my squat, first and foremost, and also get somewhere in the ballpark of a 625 total at the meet in april.

the structure of my days will be a little bit different than last semester, as will my training – both my split and my focus.

the most important thing for me, though, is redesigning where i put my emotional energy. even with school and teaching and training, i still have free time to spend either with other people or doing something quietly on my own. i’ve been looking a lot at where i choose to expend my emotional energy, and how i’d like to change that.

  • ditch tumblr. i had started one as a fun little project, counting down the last 300 days until i turned 30 with daily little snippets and anecdotes. i figured tumblr would be a good platform and i wouldn’t clutter up this blog with it. what i didn’t realize is that tumblr is a lot like high school. i already went through high school once and that was more than enough.
  • clean out my facebook (again). i have, over the past few years, gotten rid of (a) people i never talk to any more, (b) friends i only had through k, (c) k’s family, (d) anyone from treatment, and (e) with a handful of exceptions, anyone i knew through the eating disorder grapevine. i need to make another sweep through my list – i spend too much time rolling my eyes as i scroll through my feed. i like facebook because my coach uses it as his main platform, and because my students and colleagues and i have a lot of fun with it. but other than that…time to redesign.
  • stop spending time and energy on people who don’t give a shit. sounds like a no-brainer, but it’s something i need to put into practice. it’s draining to continuously try to keep a relationship intact that is simply better off dead. and it’s exhausting, in that hamster wheel kind of way, to keep thinking about it, getting upset, and then thinking about it some more. things change; people change; sometimes, people are shitty. it’s not worth the stress.
  • write more; cross-stitch more; spend time with enjoyable people. these all get lumped together because they are three things that always make me feel more alive. even if my introversion makes me super-anxious before i go out with people, once i’m out i always have a great time. as crotchety and introverted as i am, i do love positive interactions every once in a while! everybody wants to feel like they’re supported and cared about and like they belong.

there we have it, then. a redesigned spring 2014, brought to you by a lazing grad student on the last sunday morning before the semester begins. i do, in fact, have a meeting at three and another at four, so eventually i must emerge from my pajama and coffee state of hibernation. enjoy the fancy shmancy new layout!




Author: jenn

impossible to define; indefinitely impossible. maybe i'll add more here later.

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